miracle #3

there are 2 other miracles that i have not blogged about yet, but this is coming out first because time is of the essence in this one.


The summary:

to all of you who've been praying for us for a wedding date...

WE'RE GETTING MARRIED MAY 14TH 2011*.


*subject to change depending on our savings schedule and how rapidly i can lose weight.

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The longer version:

yesterday as we were heading towards the new place to check out its progress (i'd just like to say that it is absolutely gorgeous. and 80% done.) alvin's mum turned to us and said, 'well since you guys are in a hurry to get married, what you can do is to meet with another geomancer, pay $568 and ask him for a date. he will tell you exactly what to do and then you have to do it.'

i felt so uncomfortable. it's as if this whole time God is just trying to tell us, 'choose, and set your boundaries!' because what started out as a very innocent manner of respecting our parents has just snowballed into a situation where we seemingly have to share our wedding ceremony between two religions.

which is... so wrong.

later at night i was the first to arrive at aileen's place for a gathering. it ended up with me crying while explaining how bad the situation was, and later as aileen prayed for me she herself started crying. (sorry, colin!). it was a very simple prayer but through miracles 1 and 2, i've re-learnt to put a lot of faith in my prayers and i knew that things were looking up. the spiritual climate was changing!

there was a lot of deep seated sadness but this time, God given peace. i thought to myself, this must be what alvin meant when he told me 'everything is going to be alright' through the past year.

but what i didn't know was that alvin's peace had left him. later that night as i spoke to him online, he broke down and said he was running out of ideas. he was tormented that he would have to say no to his parents, or risk angering God and thus rendering our marriage unblessed.

i didn't know what to say. i admit i felt really useless. it's like, i knew God has a plan... but what exactly? and now that alvin was caught in a stalemate... the whole outlook just looked so bleak. that night i slept with a throbbing headache and a lot of heartache. i'd never seen alvin so broken.

the next day, sunday - i woke up late, and the headache was still there. i remember i sat up and my first thought was 'i need to help alvin... i need to do something.' after that as i decided not to go to church, i thought, 'this is the perfect opportunity to talk to his mom.'

i know i've always received advice that a son should talk to his mother when there are issues, and not let the daughter-in-law do it but i saw no other choice. and the chance was right there - alvin was at church, giving me ample time to speak with his mom. it's exactly what he did when he wanted to propose - he skipped a portion of church to speak with my parents.

i just felt i needed to do the same for him.

so i arranged with his mom to meet at parkway; it was a nerve-wracking 1 hour before she replied, and i had to read psalms 70 before my breathing became normal again.

and it was amazing to hear her side of the story... apparently she doesn't even want an auspicious date - she thought we wanted it so she was simply trying to help us!

i cannot believe how quickly the problem was solved. there were so many scenarios running through my mind and not a single one was this. i'm still dumbfounded by how simple everything turned out to be!

after that i felt that i could speak to alvin's mum freely, and discovered that she is a really gracious woman who is just full of love for her children. we touched so many topics - how she felt about our characters, about the impending wedding, are there any worries for us financially and as a couple, talked about the house, her family's past, how she has a stern face and i am actually scared of her (but not anymore! i absolutely respect her as a career woman who was the breadwinner for 3 generations at one point)

she also mentioned that she understands we're of a different religion from her, and whatever it is we should seek to be blessed by the church. we should stop trying to please the older generation and stand on our own two feet, and make life decisions with one another and grow as a couple, then a family.

after she said that, a thought came to mind, 'God not only solved the immediate problem, but alvin's mum pretty much assured us that although she stands in a different position religiously, she respects our choice and does not expect us to take part in things that we are not comfortable with.'

oh my goodness the relief was incredible. my present and future are both now secure in this area. my relationship with alvin's mum has just gone to another level, alvin no longer has to strive, and our lives are back on track!

when i think back about how tough the past one year has been... i can't complain. it was hard and painful with all the fights and tears but it molded me, and molded my relationship with alvin. i am sure that if it had fallen into our laps we would not have learnt how to support and appreciate each other under pressure, see God's amazing power, and strengthen relationships with our families.

it was a good battle. now to start planning. i'm actually so relieved now that i'd be satisfied with an extremely simple wedding. after the drama, we just want to start our lives together. :)

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also, we backtracked and found out that when as i met alvin's mom, he had just finished up praying during altar call. really, with God nothing is ever a coincidence.