(A melodic or harmonic configuration that creates a sense of repose or resolution.)

"But I am like a green olive tree in the house of God; I trust in the mercy of God for ever and ever." - Psalms 52:8

Saturday, June 17, 2006

playgrounds are evil.

after all the rambling i realized i totally forgot to explain why i got injured in the first place.

it was the last game for the night after kids cell, so we decided to have a round of catching at melville's playground. i was trying to catch one of the boys when i made a sharp turn, and my feet got caught somehow, and i twisted and fell.

i lay there for awhile, stunned, because i knew something was wrong and i didn't want to see how bad it was.

until one of the kids nearby told me there was BLOOD.

aileen sprinted off to get some tissue, and adeline was trying to get some order with the kids. i sat up, and took a look at my foot.

there was evidence of a blood spray on the soft playground floor, and i could tell the source was from my big toe - it was such a bloody mess but i had no idea where in my big toe. i thought it might have been a nail tear, or a small cut that somehow released a whole lot of blood. i just sat there staring at my toe.

adeline saw the look on my face, so once the kids gave me some space she bent to ask me where the injury was. i don't know how, but i just had this horrible dread that crept up unto me, and i knew immediately it was there - the crease on my big toe.

i heard this very foreign voice saying that it's there, while pointing, but i didn't feel like me at all. was probably in a shocked state while i shifted gear and let my basic instincts take over.

then i bent my big toe to see how deep the gash was before the blood clotted up.

i saw my toe bend... and my skin just opened up. it was a clean tear, no fraying ends or anything, but i saw the deepness and caught sight of something whitish when the wound was opened - it was such a morbid sight. that was when i felt faint and started seeing stars. but the kids were there and i didn't want to scare them, so i tried talking normally though all my sentences were disjointed and broke off halfway for me to stare into space.

aileen came back and wrapped my toe in tissue while asking me if i could walk to the nearby clinic. i looked at her and nodded. so we stood up, and i hobbled to the stairs while still seeing stars. my mouth was dry, so i took a sip of water.

and promptly puked into a cardboard box. i took quite awhile.

i tried to explain that i might not be able to walk anymore coz i felt so faint i just wanted to succumb to it. but aileen didn't see how deep the gash was, and she thought i was just reacting due to shock, and there was no cab around, so we continued walking while taking many stopovers for me to get blood back into my head.

apparently my face was glowing in the dark night coz i was so pale.

we walked all the way to the clinic opposite melville - i don't know how i managed it. i guess knowing i was almost reaching it pushed me... until we got there.

it was closed.

i couldn't walk anymore by then so we hailed a cab to tampines' 24-hour clinic. i went in, and the doctor peeled off my tissue and took a look. immediately she told us to go to the A&E at CGH because it's too deep and i require serious stitching.

she gave me a fruit-plus sweet coz i freaked out.

by this time i was in less of shock-mode, less stars, more comprehension of what was going on. still a bit dazed, but could say hi to dellia, sara and carolyn who happened to be nearby and came down. after paying for consultation ($37 - the bloodsuckers!!) aileen and dellia rushed me in a cab to CGH.

guess which cab came to my rescue?

a mercedes cab. :)

when we got to CGH, alvin was already there waiting - he was watching the Argentina match at his friend's at simei. at that point i was beginning to go into a 'happy tralala try to ignore bloodied foot' phase. i mean, if i kept on freaking out it wouldn't help aileen and bunch, would it? and i was right, aileen was pretty freaked when she saw how pale i became.

we got a queue number and settled down. went in for a basic check-up by the nurse first, any concussion? headache? how bad is the pain (stupidly told her 'oh, it's ok la. maybe 7/10.'), and she checked for blood pressure, temperature and drug allergies.

there might have been a point where i tried to inject too much joy and could not stop laughing and talking loudly. my goodness, i felt like i was going mad. according to al i was still in shock judging from the way i talked and my eyes were kinda unfocused.

then dennis came to join dellia when my number was called. i went in accompanied by del, lammy, and al, while the doctor took off the gauze wrapping (from the 24-hour clinic) while i cringed and really, really, wanted to cry. but i didn't because if i let that happen i might've totally lost control and let the whole incident overwhelm me.

i felt so frightened and out of my skin. but i was so blessed to have 3 people who just kept trying to keep my mind off all the fear by telling me jokes. :)

then i had to go for an x-ray to find out if i had any fractures, so del and dennis went home first (but not before i reached out and patted her belly, heh). after it was done, i took it back to the doc and she mentioned that i'll need a tetanus jab, and at least 2 jabs for local anaesthesia.


the tetanus jab burned like crap and now i look as if i've had 2 BCGs done on my arm, and then when i went into the operating theatre, aileen and al couldn't enter, so i got the major heebie-jeebies.

i lay down on the cold stretcher and got a blanket from the friendly nurse but i just. couldn't. stop. shuddering!!!

then the doctor said she was going to give me 2 jabs first and a stitch up to close the wound.

IT HURT SO BAD. it was even worse than having the tear because it went straight to the nerve and stung. no, it felt more like my nerve was getting sucked out slowly. and she only numbed the front of my toe, so when she started to stitch into the back of my toe, i yelped.

so she had to put anaesthesia again.

this time i screamed before i bit on the blanket, arched my back and squeezed my eyes shut. when i opened them, i started crying a little, and didn't stop until she finished up the stitches. i have no idea how many there were, i didn't dare look.

so after all the drama, i limped outside to look for alvin and aileen, then collected my medicine and left.

it was so horrible. don't ever run in your slippers.


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